“You aren’t welcome here”,
I tell the storm-
That swirls inside me
Silent and menacing.
“You aren’t welcome here”,
I tell it.
I can’t let it
Ruin the peace
Of my mind
The steadiness
Of my heart.
I carry the shadow
Of the storm
In me everyday.
It mocks me,
It taunts me,
It follows me-
So closely
That somedays I feel
It is me,
And I am it.
Yet I tell it,
“You aren’t welcome here”
I keep it at bay,
But just barely-
It swims,
just below the surface
of the oceans
Of my soul.
Calm and
Soundless
On the good days,
and restlessly
rearing it’s head
on the bad days.
“You aren’t welcome here”,
I remind it,
When it knocks on my door
when I’m alone
At night.
And it leaves silently-
Most of the times.
Lately,
The storm’s been
Breaking through
The silence.
It’s been
whispering in my ears,
Stirring up
A soundless frenzy
in my heart.
Threatening
to wreck the walls
and bring me
Crashing down.
“You aren’t welcome here”
I tell it again.
But now I’m not sure
It heard.
It’s louder
than the beats of my heart.
It’s bigger
than my very existence.
It grew in me,
But lives beside me.
I made it,
But it controls me.
I shouldn’t let it,
I tell it,
“You aren’t welcome here”
but now,
It doesn’t even listen.